Wednesday, April 21, 2010

3 Facebook Status Updates Sure To Annoy Invigorate Your Friend’s

Not too long ago, I mentioned the enjoyment I, along with all of your Facebook friend's, receive when you inundate every status update with political discussion (Geeky Rant – Politics in Facebook: Political Podium or Friend Offender ) but left out a few other's that we all enjoy. Here are three more things that you should post constantly to annoy the shit enhance your Facebook friend's experience online.

- Talk about God in every post
People love this. While some may think that each individual has a right to choose their own theological beliefs, they are wrong. There is truly only one God and only one true belief - and that is your belief. Let us know. Quote scripture, change your profile picture to your favorite religious emblem, and take full advantage of the ability to post links, video, and pictures. We enjoy feeling like we are in church every time that we open up Facebook, it is invigorating.

- Let us know how much you love your husband/wife/girlfriend/boyfriend
You have the perfect significant other and it should be shouted from the roof tops so the world knows. Now, if it is your anniversary or if they just got a promotion, that is reason to post a nice endearing message. But, who needs a special event, post daily how perfect you think that they are and how magical your life is with them. While some may think that you may be masking some sort of inner issues by having to use each and every single post to remind us how lucky you are, damn the naysayers. Let us know ad nauseam.

- Quote those song lyrics with every post
Every once in awhile I may have a song in my head and just go ahead and quote it but I don't take nearly the time or put forth the effort that I should. I love reading your song lyrics each update. I know that you love 50's Be-Bop and I look forward to reading the profound words of that era each and every time I log in. "I love you darlin'/Baby, you know I do/But I've got to see this Book of Love/Find out why it's true." It's like poetry in motion. Song lyrics are the thoughts and dreams of some of the world's most profound poets put forth to melody and you should post the words alone and leave the melody to our minds.

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