10.) "I wish every game had the Konami code." or "I'm going need to look up a code for this one."
There are many a game I wish I had up to 90 lives to tame, it is a sure sign that you suck and should just admit it to save us all some wonderment. If you can't take the time to try to get good at the game before begging for a code, you probably shouldn't be playing it.
9.) "My favorite game is a toss between 'Rock Band' and 'Guitar Hero'."
In the end - fun, yes...true gaming - no. These are for those who cannot understand the complexity of solving the puzzles that lie beneath the outter shell of gaming. These are games that are intended to bring nOObs into gaming. Hence, making them suck at gaming.
8.) "There is something wrong with this controller." or "I think the batteries are going on your wireless controller."
The famous, "I pushed the button" statement. If you "pushed the button" you would have fired/jumped/ducked. It worked fine for me. Perhaps, push the button a second earlier, it will make a BIG difference.
7.) "I hate playing online because my connection just isn't fast enough to keep up."
While I understand that bandwidth can vary depending on provider, plans, area, time of day, etc. That being said, the reason that you are being schooled at Halo isn't your slow connection, it is your slow reflexes.
6.) "Going to Dave and Buster's huh? I love skee-ball!"
Gaming and drinking, all in one place. Don't get me wrong, I love skee-ball (reminds me of the old arcade days), but there is only one place where you can have such a utopian combination. Do not waste it simply because you suck.
5.) "I'm really in the mood for some Wii bowling."
The fact that these words escape your mouth speaks volumes.
4.) "This game is just impossible. Seriously, no one can beat it."
I admit there are some games that give me a hard time (see my 10 Hardest NES games here - http://geekyclown.com/?p=50) but saying the game is impossible just shows your lack of desire to get better at the game. There are a ton of games that I wouldn't take the time to get better at but I don't think there are any (maybe Silver Surfer) that are impossible (I would like to believe the game's developer at least beat it).
3.) "I can't play the old school games because they suck compared to the next gen systems."
No, you can't play them because you suck at them and don't want to admit to your friends that you suck at a 2-D, 8/16-Bit game. Perhaps beating some of the old school games will make you suck less.
2.) "The system reset."
You go to get a drink leaving your sucky video game friend alone in the room and come back to find out the system mysteriously reset itself. It doesn't matter what system it is, a NES, Genesis, TG-16, Wii, 64, Super NES, PS I/II/III/P, Atari 2600/5200/7800, Xbox/360, etc., they all have serious power problems that only result when you leave the room.
1.) "That Glass Joe is a real bitch to take down."
Self explanatory.
silver surfer is definitely hard, but even i beat at least 2 of the worlds back in the day...if i remember correctly battletoads was harder.
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